Pick me up uppercut

[generaljanuary]

Free studies are starting to look alright to me. I used to be pretty sure I didn't want to enter university, but the more I think about it, the more I think going back to college with no idea what's waiting for me after is bit of a no-go. I've been whining for years that I've become a drifter because I spent all my teens thinking I would most likely not live past twenty and therefor had no actual plan for the future.
So... I think I'm going to look into financial aid (my dad always said I wouldn't have to keep paying him to stay home if I went back to school, but I know that he couldn't afford losing the feeble amount I provide him each month...)and enter university in free studies in order to gather enough credits to enter an actual uni program. I'm thinking... teaching. French or English, most likely. In secondary school(high school) or cegep (college). I dunno... I just really, really badly want to do something concrete other than working my crappy, CRAPPY job. Seriously. I want to feel like I'm actually worth something. Like I'm a pro-active part of society, or whatever. I just don't want to be that ridiculous college dropout wasting away in a fast-food place forever.

I've got to hunt down new comms, my regulars have gone almost dead in the last week or so.

Comments

[mightymaeve.livejournal.com]

And those caplocks are my fangirly joy dedicated to Fanny_Moon!

You and I are absolutely on the same page. It's like you ripped my life out of my head with your descriptions of your thoughts on your life above.

I thought I wouldn't make it past 20,had no delusions of being anything to the point of horrific darkness. . .so I never took steps to follow my passions. Why would I? I wasn't worth it.

After much self-esteem work and behavioural cognitive change, (still ongoing! LOL wryly) I have finally stopped whining and done something about it too, but with small, attainable goals. I have an 'all or nothing' mentality problem! (LOL wryly again)

"Out of its secret hiding place had crept his soul, and desire had come to meet it on the way."

I'm excited for you, reading this entry of yours above!!!

I think you are such an introspective, observant and large-hearted person,that you'd be a great high school teacher. Are you patient and tough too? ^_*

What does this mean? ". . .enter university in free studies in order to gather enough credits to enter an actual uni program." Isn't Quebec like Ontario, where you just apply for whatever Bachelor program and go from there?

Thanks for the fangirly joy ^^(or something) lol

[fanny-moon.livejournal.com]

This is still a bit uncanny to me, to know that there ARE people who CAN relate to the way I feel or have felt. Surely you know what I mean.
I'm glad to hear that you are taking steps in the right direction for you and I hope you continue pursuing that happiness. (The light outside of the low self-esteem cavern, that is.) :)

Thanks for the compliments, I'm harbouring a sizzling blush. Tough, depends. Patient, very much- or so I am told.

I'm not really sure about the education system in Ontario, but in Quebec after elementary school, you go on to Secondary school, which lasts five years. After that, you can either go into professional studies (usually manual work) or CEGEP (General and Professional Education College). In Cegep, you can enter a pre-uni program (2 years) or a vocational program (3 years). And after that you can enter University. I never completed a Cegep program, so I strayed off the normal course of things. Lucky me, Universities accept what they call Adult Students. To be n adult student you must have completed secondary school, be 21 or older and have been out of school for at least two years. Adult students can then be directed towards the classes they need to take in order to gather the credits they need to enter their program of choice. (phew, that was sort of long-winded, hope I didn't bore you to tears)